'Spaceman' review: Sandler, giant spider adrift in wonky sci-fi drama

Picture the heartache of "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" with none of its visual flair, in space, with a giant talking spider and you have something of a roadmap into "Spaceman," the lethargic Adam Sandler vehicle that sends our beloved Sandman floating aimlessly off into the cosmos.

Sandler stars as Jakub Procházka, a Czech cosmonaut on a solo mission to the stars, to investigate a mysterious purple haze that is floating above Earth's atmosphere. He leaves behind his pregnant wife Lenka (Carey Mulligan), and their strained relationship — she's leaving him, and wants to deliver the breakup message in the middle of his year-long mission — is at the core of director Johan Renck's ("Chernobyl") sci-fi drama.

Jakub is coming to terms with the dissolution of his relationship and feeling the guilt of choosing his work over his wife when he comes face to face with a giant spider aboard his spacecraft. This spider is not a menacing presence, however, it is a calming one, and is voiced in a HAL-like monotone by Paul Dano, whose dialogue sounds like its been slowed to half-speed. Jakub and the spider eventually become pals after Jakub introduces his eight-legged passenger to the pure pleasures of hazelnut spread, and Jakub dubs his new pal Hanus. (Hanus prefers to call Jakub "skinny human.")

It all sounds like an outright howler, but Renck plays things completely deadpan, and "Spaceman" unfolds at a languid, near-comatose pace. It fashions itself as an exploration of existentialism, as Jakub retreats deep into the recesses of his mind and confronts his relationship with his father and how it contributed to his desire to literally leave Earth, but more often than not, Renck finds himself on the wrong side of the line between cerebral and silly.

The script by Colby Day, which is based on Jaroslav Kalfař's 2017 novel "Spaceman of Bohemia," is full of all manner of outer space mumbo jumbo as Jakub and Hanus head toward the glowing purple light, which represents some sort of celestial rebirth. Sounds good, but it's not enough to wake "Spaceman" from its cosmic slumber, as it hurtles off into the great nothingness above.

agraham@detroitnews.com

'Spaceman'

GRADE: C-

Rated R: for language

Running time: 108 minutes

On Netflix