Oxford students find purpose 1,500 miles away in Uvalde: 'We're here for each other'

They were bonded by feelings no child should know.

Two tragedies 1,500 miles apart brought them together on this day.

Sixteen high school seniors from Oxford traveled to Uvalde, Texas, on Saturday to meet survivors of the Robb Elementary School shooting. The Oxford students tie-dyed shirts and played soccer and limbo with the younger Uvalde children in the afternoon and evening.

The goal of the Survivors United Playday was clear: love and support.

"After you go through something like that ... you know, you're (feeling) guilty. You don't feel like you should be having a good time and laughing," said Josie Stoffan, a 17-year-old Oxford senior. "So I think this event is really good because we've been, you know, playing games with them ... and letting them know you need to laugh and have a good time to get through it."

Zoe Touray, 18, who graduated from Oxford last school year, helped organize the event at the Ssgt. Willie de Leon Civic Center, the same place where parents and loved ones of Robb Elementary School students waited for hours in May to find out if their children were alive.

"They're allowed to still be kids," Touray said. "We're here for each other and to regain that childlike innocence that they lost."

On May 24, an 18-year-old gunman took the lives of 19 elementary school children and two teachers at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, making it the deadliest school shooting in Texas history. Six months earlier, a 15-year-old's shooting rampage at Oxford High School left four of his classmates dead and seven people injured.

The Uvalde shooter was shot and killed by border patrol officers over an hour after hundreds of federal, state and local law enforcement officers arrived on the scene. The Oxford gunman pleaded guilty last month to 24 criminal charges, including first-degree murder and terrorism.

The Oxford survivors who volunteered at Saturday's event were part of the International Baccalaureate program and founded the Oxford Legacy Foundation the day after the Uvalde school shooting. They teamed up with Touray, who founded the Survivors Embracing Each Other initiative to support gun-violence survivors after she returned to Oxford High this fall as a guest speaker and talked about her plans for the event.

"Once they (Uvalde) had their shooting ... we knew exactly how it worked, and we knew how they felt so we put all of our energy, like our grieving energy, from that shooting into Oxford Legacy," Stoffan said. "Being able to connect with other survivors and stuff, especially close to our anniversary, I think is just helping us move forward. Although you know, we can't completely get over it — it's not closure."

Uvalde is a small city located 85 miles west of San Antonio, with a population of around 15,000 people, roughly three-quarters of whom are Hispanic. Oxford is a predominately White community about 40 miles north of Detroit. It's within Oxford Township, which has a population of roughly 22,000. Despite their differences, the Oxford students said the Texas community reminded them of home.

"I've seen so many 'Uvalde strong' signs that just, I mean, it reminds me so much of being back home," said Abdullah Ali, 17, an Oxford senior. "It's a very close-knit community. Everybody seems to know everybody else, and it's just it's really heartwarming to see."

Despite having never met the Uvalde children before, Oxford senior Quin Quidort said they already felt bonded.

"We can relate to these kids on such a different level and obviously, we both went through the same tragedy," the 17-year-old said. "Unfortunately, we all have this like trauma bond, where we're all in this together. And the worst thing for these kids is for them to think that they're alone."

The Oxford students said they had to lean on each other and the community in the aftermath of last year's shooting. Some found Saturday's event itself helped in their healing.

"They're helping me personally, at least along with my healing journey just as much as we're here trying to help them even," Quidort said. "Showing that it's OK to laugh still and be a kid; it reminds me sometimes that I shouldn't have that guilt."

Ali said the sense of purpose it gave him was "like no other." He hopes the Uvalde children don't repress what happened last May, but that it is acknowledged so they can move forward.

Saturday was one of the first times Stoffan had been able to talk with people who survived other shootings.

"There's this connection," she said. "But we also got to talk about things that no one else would understand. Like, we talked about going back to school and how the community felt. ...

"I think from them, (Uvalde) I'm learning bravery and you know, just to go out of your comfort zone," Stoffan said.

hmackay@detroitnews.com